It's Not About the Food

 I distinctly remember the day in Denmark when the thought hit me. "Is this mission going to be just cooking?" I wrestled with that throughout. I did a lot of cooking on that mission. I loved the mission, I loved the young people, I loved the country. I loved everything - except the cooking. Yet, I loved it when young people would come into the center, be delighted when they smelled something cooking, and engage with others warmly over a "homecooked" meal. There is actually something quite delightful in serving a hungry person something to eat.

When we first came here to Oxford, Dave said that the senior couple in London regularly fixed meals for 200 hungry young adults. He put an end to that. The sister was actually one of those rare individuals who absolutely adored cooking and spent a great deal of time planning, preparing and serving. It was exactly the kind of mission she wanted to serve. She was good at it.

Dave didn't want it to be all about the food. He wanted the young people to come to experience good fellowshipping, fun activities, and spiritual nourishment. For a while it worked. Then COVID hit. The last we heard, the huge young adult ward in London wasn't doing anything at all during the week. The senior couple had left, and Family Home Evening, Institute and other activities ground to a halt. - Which is sad, because it is this last year when all those young people needed that the most.

Young missionaries, used to having one or two dinner invitations a week, languished in their own flats, eating peanut butter sandwiches and the like. 

I had already reached this conclusion, but it has come with more force in the last two months. It really isn't about the food, but there is something so charming, so warming, so human to relax and enjoy each others' company - over a meal. Even though Dave put an end to gigantic meals being served in London, his own behavior (or perhaps Deb's) points to the fact that whenever he gathered missionaries, whether it was ten or two hundred, he fed them. It was always very important to him.

So today I cooked. 

We had District Council this morning. Normally that involves the six young missionaries in our district, and us. Today, about ten minutes before we sat down to eat, two sisters from a town about an hour away came by to pick up the Oxford sisters. It was nearly one, so they thought we would have eaten. They were cute and apologetic for showing up. But we had them sit down with us and eat, and they couldn't have been more grateful.

It was Elder Field's last real day as a missionary since he will be up bright and early in the morning and on his way to London, where he will attend several things involving outgoing missionaries, and then board a plane home to Phoenix Arizona. So we had the appropriate rituals for him.

Our district leaders had the meeting go as always, with some excellent training. He had Elder Field and his companion demonstrate a good teaching appointment. It took them about ten minutes as they covered all the bases, with Elder Field playing the part of the missionary and Elder White playing the part of someone learning about the gospel. When it was finished, we were each asked to contribute a positive comment about what they had done.

I gave mine and then turned to SK to hear what he would say. He sat there scowling, and then in a combative manner announced that he didn't like it at all, that it was one of the worst he had ever heard, and that he didn't even like their tone of voice.

I was dumbfounded. He went on for a minute or two. I did not know how to stop that train wreck. Elder Field and Elder White were equally flabbergasted. In fact, they were deeply embarrassed, and muttered a few comments. 

I tried to stop SK from talking. I was so shocked at his behavior, I was actually wondering if he had had a small stroke or something.

We moved on to the next comment, on around the circle, and SK piped up again at how disgustingly bad it was, and even imitated Elder Field. It was awful!

Elder Reynoldson finally and mercifully stood to end the discussion. He began laughing -- it was all a joke, and he and his companion and Elder Field and Elder White had discussed with SK before the meeting began how they would conduct that part of the meeting. They asked SK to really crush Elder Field. None of them were quite prepared for SK's acting job. The sisters and I were the only ones who didn't know and we were all appalled, embarrassed and shocked.

It actually took me awhile to realize that SK was a far better actor than I ever supposed.

Sister Jones opened our meeting with a sweet song accompanying herself on the ukulele 

We had a great lunch with all of them, cleaned up everything, and then I began again, to prepare a meal for Sid and her boyfriend Marc. I adore them. Sid is getting her Ph.D from Oxford. She is brilliant and so very interested in making the world a better place. Her boyfriend Marc is from Spain, and so very kind, so very knowledgeable, so gentle. 

We had a lovely dinner and discussion. While I fixed dessert, SK gave Marc a half hour discussion about The Book of Mormon. Marc listened attentively, asking respectful questions. It was great.

I spent a whole lot of time in the kitchen, and I did a fair amount of cooking, and we spent a fair amount of time cleaning up from all the cooking and eating, and it has been a beautiful day.

But it really isn't about the food.